Mama JOURNAL RESPONSES 1st Transfer 1st Area OTTAWA 2/19/26- 5/7/26 (comps Morgan and Curtis)

journal response pg 28-30

 Oh sweet abe—that journal entry melted my heart!  Your faith!!! Your BIG faith!  It’s amazing- I mean you are living it- but from the outside looking in- it’s crazy the level of faith this takes and that you need and that you feel—it’s like moving mountains kind of faith- the kind that the Lord is BOUND to respond to—He is- I see it in everything that is happening- It’s like you have these little twists (like Avery on send off day at the airport, like the best MTC district, like the key and Elder Uctforf, like being able to pack, and handling being separated from the group at the airport, to a companion you can love so quickly and then to your placement in an English area (for now), to contacting on the metro,  ALL OF IT KNOWN & ORCHESTRATED BY THE LORD—who knows your name and has called you to do His work!

Thank you for not making me wait until pday to know these details!  It’s so cute you feel like you are on a movie—like the Errand of Angels—and you are—you are an angel on an errand with the Lord—so it’s not that weird—but it will take time to wake up and feel like this is your life.

I wondered how you answered when the mp asked why you decided to serve- and yay for keeping your emotions in check- that is a blessing- I’m glad you had such a nice impression of them initially.  I am sure you will grow to love them- as you were blessed that you would.

Any talk of the mission splitting? Who goes where or how that works? Church news is releasing the newly called MP couples slowly—I remember it took awhile for the Peterson’s name to get announced officially- but I’ll be watching for a Halifax MP couple in case it matters.  Either way, it’s so good that you are “where your feet are” being present and all in whatever that looks like.  I know you are worried about the French- but keep doing you personal language study- you should have that allotted time for it—Emma had 9 months of doing personal study with Italian while in Hawaii and no one else around her learning it or speaking it- and when she had the chance to go- she figured it out and the Lord compensated her weakness with HIS power and blessed her.  He will bless you too- maybe you need this time to settle in missionary mode and gain experience in testifying so that when the language piece is added in bigger measure- you’re ready to grow in that way. 

We’ll have to ask Emma on pday about her first trainer—I remember Emma loved her (later found out she was a little shady on somethings with elders…hahaha but Emma didn’t know that at first) but she was on her last transfer and then I think Emma got another trainer—but just see how it goes—the Lord is going to give you what you need—I keep thinking about that quote—“if He called you to do it, He’s prepared to help you do it” It’s also normal and okay to feel happy and excited and sad at the same time—those urges to cry it out are good too- use that shower time to release it—You’ll probably feel better afterwards!

You look beautiful and happy in your pictures—it looks cold.  I am glad you’ll get to the store- and maybe you can get some boots and a coat—looks like you’ll have snow today!

Oh I love you—you are so fully engaged and all in and the Lord loves you so!  His Soeur Miller has launched!!!!! We are so proud of you.

I am still thinking you can’t see messenger and anxious to know on Pday what that will look like—but we’re all cheering for you and I’m putting the pics on that are on your camera roll.  Dad says, “it’s crazy and wonderful to see her in the field”  ♥ You are setting such a marvelous example for all of us!

Dad said they are staying in a dive motel that smells like sewage Hahaha (I think Zak was in charge of the lodgings so I’m not sure what happened there) but they played a round yesterday and dad and kyle lost by 1—today they are playing 2 rounds (36 holes) probably to see who buys steak dinner so I hope it goes better today.  It’s fun for them to be together—I’ll attach a pic of them to this email so you can see it in case you can’t get to messenger-

I will have Miller this weekend—today is Seth’s bday- if you have time to write a short note and take a pic I’ll find it on your camera roll and take a picture— today they're gonna bring Miller over around noon going to have a couples massage with a gift certificate they have and then they’ll go back to their place and G and I and Lainey will bring Miller to their house in the evening pick up Sadie and Seth and go all of us too Lainey’s  basketball game (officially done with Slam and playing Culture Shock (Steve) and his top team- we’ll see how that goes- Lainey is feeling good about where she’s landed) and then they’re gonna come back over and watch Hawaii Five-0.  Saturday we have Basketball and seth /sadie are going to bring Miller over around four when bball is done and go out to dinner cause I think they initially were going to go to dinner after their massage as part of the birthday Anyway, because of L basketball, they couldn’t do the dinner after the massage so Saturday night they’ll bring Miller over and go on a dinner date and then it was so cute cause she’s like and then Sunday we’re just going to come over for our regular thing like we always do so I’m like yeah yeah that’s all good  But it will be a lot… wonderful but a lot.  I’m so happy to do it though and so glad they are close.  Glad they will let me and glad to be needed ♥ Dad gets back from Arizona Sunday afternoon and we'll celebrate Seth's bday!

It was great to have Miles home last weekend—he was kind of sick so we didn’t do a lot, but it was also nice that he was home feeling like that so he could be taken care of and recuperate a little.  He was feeling better (not awesome) Monday heading back.  I  think Miles might have had a date this week—one with a girl from the app he wasn’t that hyped on and the other one is kind of a set up date--Do you remember a girl name? Name  Do you remember Gracie husky from Skyview- anyway, Jefferson was over here doing trees and he mentioned that he knew the best girl home from her mission. Maybe six months. Just an awesome girl and thought that Miles should take her out, so Miles kind of got backed into the corner on that one and I don’t know that he’ll be interested. She was on the frosh team when Emma was a senior, I think. Anyway, he wasn’t super excited about that one either. But at least he’s got some things on the social calendar. Emma said they went to cousin dinner last night at Kenedee’s. I don’t think that Emma is usually invited to though so she was glad to go and Maggie was there so it was Nate boys and Miles and Emma and Noah and Maggie. She said it was super disappointing. The whole thing was kind of like a bag fast on everyone else. And just the caliber isn’t the best. I asked her how Miles held himself in that situation in that peer group and she said it was cool to see because he kind of checks out when he needs to like when they go down the road of things that aren’t kind or not appropriate, and he leads out as needed, like if the subject needs to be changed or Whatever. But it makes me glad that he’s not living with Nates boys. I think cache is a little bit easier to be let along outside of that Group.  Emma got a jersey from Lainey and had a great second game (no falling this time) and they won game 2.  Both Miles and Noah and Emma and Liv play this coming Wed night.  I’m glad they are doing it.

So there’s a little recap 😊  We all love you so much!

Elder Kearon gave a talk snippet from a come follow me video, Elder Kearon  said that the way to avoid the trap of feeling like we’re falling short is to” remember that the whole purpose is to draw us closer to God.  Se need to rely on Jesus Christ and remember that the purpose of covenants is to help us, not hinder us-He’s not putting up obstacles, and we’re meant to find the way and enjoy our time”

Hope you have a wonderful first few days.  Give yourself grace—BECOME  a little bit every day. Tell your companion we love her and thank her for taking care of you!!! Xoxo Mama

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2/2//26

Hi Sweet Missionary of mine

 

Thank you for all the great pictures!  It’s so fun!

I just got back from helping at Dad’s office with an emergency extraction—I wish I was a better assistant when he needs me to be but he’s super patient with me—I’m mostly just there so he’s not alone with a patient. 😊 I mean I hold the suction, but that’s about it.  Lainey has a tournament this weekend  and McCall Mayhem is part of it which is a joke bc they can’t compete- last week their closest game was v Premier 10-90)  so you get the drift.  I think we play them tomorrow morning the Sat 8am game ooof—8 am on a Saturday and McCall Mayhem?  Anyway—I am not sure of the team they play tonight- but if they beat them- then I think a championship medal is pretty much a given tomorrow.

 

I talked to Emma today and we worked out her work schedule when she’s living here- in June anyway when they get back from Bali—and hooray!  She’s going to teach swim!  Yay!  I was stressed about that—it’s good for Little Fish Swim School, good for dad bc he can fill her schedule easier w/out her being full time, and good for Emma bc it allows her to start up slowly just out of school- so she’ll do swim 9:30, 10:30, & 11:30 and then get showered and eat and then go Alliance and do hygiene from 2-5.  She can make more teaching swim than hygiene, but not as many hours—so this is a good set up for everyone! Also makes me feel better about Lainey’s first year just having Emma in the pool too.

 

Sadie and Seth will come over tomorrow afternoon, Dad and the kids will do baptisms, Saide and Seth haven’t been to the temple in a long time, so they will do an endowment and I’ll watch miller.  Then I think they’ll come back over for dinner and a lakers/warriors game and then Hawaii 5-0—they are on the last season now!

Hopefully you’ve had an email from Miles—The roundabout update as I perceive it is that she was really nice—she knew you and Emma—but I don’t think Miles was totally feeing it- which is a bummer bc she’s from here, they had lots in common, she’s not obnoxious, not high maintenance, a good girl, good missionary- good family- but just not a total click.  Trying to just let Miles navigate that- trusting that he knows how to weigh light v looks, or the vibe with all the most important parts—and it’s okay for him to want to feel excited about someone—I am glad (and grateful he would take her out) and I wish there had been some sparks—but I think prob not—although she did small talk text him after?  One thing that was AWKARD about it that crazily, Liv and her roommates were at the same ice cream place eating ice cream during the date- and Liv knows Gracie bc Gracie’s mom was Liv’s YW president- If I didn’t know better, it’s like operation spy date but I think it was just a random coincidence- but I think that made it a little weird for Miels—they talked to them and everything- but just might’ve been easier without that going on simultaneously- so not a total done deal, but probably.

 

I hope you loved Zone Conference today and had a chance to get to know other missionaries as well as your MP and wife a little more.  They are so lucky to have you.  I love that you are enjoying your trainer—seems like she is a hard worker and fun while doing it which is a great combo—she scored big time with a greenie like you

 

So to your journal:

Page 31 Hopefully you are slowly getting to know your district better—it will take awhile and that’s okay! They will love you as they get to know you.

I love that day one you had an opportunity to testify!  So powerful- that you can and that you did!

Page 32 It’s so nice that your days feel both busy and productive.  What a sweet service opportunity to help with the bishop’s storehouse—I bet that would be so humbling and it’s cool you helped them with those needs in a way that helped them feel dignity in it.  I love how it all works—it makes you look at things like fast offerings that you’ll do after your mission in a whole different light.

Glad you survived the new year potluck—I get a kick out of thinking of you in missionary mode at those things bc I know at home you (and me if I’m honest) dreaded those functions and would want to be the first to leave—although you’d always stay to help clean up or be there early to set up—sometimes it’s just hard to get there—I bet it meant a lot to those members to gather and have it be a theme they loved

Page 33 I bet your first missionary Sunday was interesting- and made this all feel real!  That’s great you had 4 friends there—how awesome.

Off topic Relief Society lessons are not that rare which is unfortunate—with my new calling that’s going to get a lot more interesting for me—ugh.  Gently redirecting- finding a way to make a comment that brings it back. We’ve set it up so pretty much every RS Sunday I’ll be in a different ward visiting—I think it’s the best way to get to know the sisters and the presidencies, just to be more visible to them, love them and see them. But I am not looking forward to weedy lessons or weird comments – or being given “some time for our Stake RS president” to share thoughts—I am not good off the cuff!  Someone told me I should keep a tally of the talks I give—and then they guessed that in 5 years of this calling it’d probably get me to 100 talks== what?????? I hope not. 1 so far!  Hahaha! (maybe if I count talks and lessons) yikes.

I am so glad that your piano playing at the baptism went well; my guess is that you did better than you think you did and I love that you have all kinds of markers to measure your blessings- and that you felt a fulfillment in those areas just as you needed to.  If it matters to you it matters to me…😊

Page 34 RIP (hahaha)  pdays—we want it to be all the good things!!  I am sorry it ended that way though—I totally was saying good bye to the group waiting to say goodbye and love you to just you—I’ll always be the very last to hangup – I promise!

It’s a pretty powerful thing that you feel as scared as you do or that you wake up with a pit in your stomach but you still go and do—it’s a wonderful example to me of being all in and trusting in the Lord;  there will always be parts of it that are scary or not your favorite- but when you consider all of it- the Lord’s time, on His errand- it’s neat to think what that consecration can call down- blessings and miracles!

Sweet Sister mcRae—you’ve just got to love members that feed missionaries- even if it is sus.. I’m thinking Janice vibes—edible but sus.

I love the positive self talk, “I’m progressing” “I’m getting the hang of this” Yes girl!  You will get more settled in it as you go- btu that you launch where you are is beautiful!

Sounds like Samuel needs a lot of love and support and it’s okay to lead him along a little ways until he feels more steady—spiritually and temporally and YES the Lord will provide—I hope you are correlating with a ward mission leader/bishop so they are mindful of the needs.

Page 36 It’s good to be exhausted in this work. That means you are giving your best! I am worried about the boots situation- we’ll talk about it on pday- I just don’t’ want you to ruin your other ones!

Thank you for sharing your journal with me.  I love it—It will always be a safe space for all things—so let it loose and let it go!

So—better wrap this up soon…

I was just looking at our cruise and that Monday how it will work for that pday—we go to Turks & Caicos Island that day- we’ve rented a golf cart to tour around different beaches—I was hoping it was a sea day bc then we could have talked long—but maybe we can talk first thing in the morning and I’ll be sure big kids are aware to try to be more available.  Okay this is important Abe-- Let’s get something straight—none of us are ever  worried about how long you want to talk on pday—the bigs get it bc  they’ve been there- and I love it and want to be on as long as possible—so when we ask you about timeframes- we are just planning our day around yours—so don’t let that worry you in the slightest--- having said that, on that Monday March 16- Emma has her board exam- not sure if that will be a morning thing or a big part of the day or not- but I’m sure she’ll hop on as soon as she can and we’ll be on the island without internet for a good part of that day- so I’ll make sure Miles and Sadie esp are aware.  Maybe you can push for a fun adventure checking out some sight seeing thing in Ottawa that day that takes longer—when you are planning out p-days—try to plan something awesome for March 16^th

On a personal note- Barbara Skovensky while I love her- is slowly driving me crazy- she has the best intentions but consistently oversteps her role—I know she just wants to help but I am struggling a little with how to reign her in—Stay in your lane barb—she shouldn’t try to initiate things with wards without us counseling about it. Today after one such effort I tried to be so kind- but I just said, It’s important that we run things up the channels before sharing with the ward level—we need to counsel as a presidency and often times I need to get clarification on what President Tripple would like up to implement and prioritize—I think she got the drift and seemed okay but I needed to get the message across…( she was trying to figure out how to encourage sisters to get back to the temple who have expired recommends- and that information is pretty delicate sometimes as to why someone hasn’t renewed their recommend—so sometimes RS presidents aren’t privy to that—and it was just kind of something she was communicating with secretaries about with out running by me- and if she had I wouldn’t have green lit it--  she’s so fabulous at organizing loose ends, arranging visits, and assignments and keeping track of what is needful- but wow…. That’s a big enough job Barb—Sorry just needed to vent- I love her and appreciate all of her intentions- I tried to be clear about it and show love after- hope it came across that way.

I had a good dinner date with Lisa and Michelle last night—fun to catch up. Lisa is pretty serious with a guy in Reno Nevada- He’s a rancher (hallmark-Esque kind of storyline—divorcee meets rancher) seems like a great guy but not a member—supportive of her though in it—I’m happy for her—likely means she’ll be moving to Nevada though- and getting married.  I’ll miss her but wish her happiness.  Hopefully he can be open to learning about her faith because I know it’s so important to her- I hope she can maintain it on her own if that’s where this goes with her marrying him.  That’s not public news-ll don’t know how to say that word)- 

I have loved reading about Abraham and Isaac and Haggar and her son and Lot and his wife this week in come follow me—so many good lessons in there. I just kept being reminded that our God is a good that sees.  IT’s a section about a God that provided for a mother—and that’s tender to me-- I loved in Genesis 21- how it says in v 17: that “God heard the voice… where he is”- that was so meaning ful to me because a tender part of my testimony is knowing that our Heavenly Father is willing to meet us where we are.  When I read verse 22 I thought of you “ God is with you thee in all that thou doest” So true—I hope you feel in in abundance every day, every door, every effort to be a light in Ottawa! 

I love you with all my heart- You are doing better than you think you are.  We are so proud of you.  Xoxo Mama  

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3/3/26 Hi Love

Looks like sweet girls you are doing exchanges with from the pictures—I hope so. I am sure you’ll be glad to get back to your bed tonight!

Journal responses:

Page 36 Glad you enjoyed Zone Conference and that you were able to feel the spirit.  I think it’s probably fair to not feel a tight connection to your MP at first—I mean it takes time to build a relationship—and he can probably tell easily and quickly and discern by the spirit also what kind of missionary you are!

Page 37: What a sweet experience at Starbucks—I love that needed and instant guidance from the spirit that you got—even just at a Starbucks in a bathroom—the Lord sends what you need.  Such a sweet inspiration- Do your best and I’ll take care of the rest—that’s good counsel for the rest of your life; and I’m so glad you were impressed with that message at that moment you needed it.  I’m glad you were able to move along and out of Starbucks—the Lord works it out!!!

Page 38: I am so excited to find out about the splitting up and assignments in May for your mission—that’s a big game changer- keep trusting that the Lord needs you where he sends you—you are called as his missionary more than called to a place!  Called to find certain people—and His plan is perfect=  But it will be nice to just know and move forward.

It was so fun to hear about Elder Anderson’s email from you on pday.  It was cute!  Fun stuff- just keep it in its box in your thoughts and move forward—the Lord will bless you with all the things when it’s time.

Page 39:I hope things look up for Samuel soon—the Lord sees him whether he is on or off date!  It’s cute that Joe Steve made the salt joke—it means on some deeper level that he gets that he needs to apply the scriptures to himself, even in fun.  I like that your comp is fun with friends like that—not too buttoned up—it’s serious stuff- but it’s also okay to have fun along the way—not all missionaries know how to do both at the same time.

How cool about sharing a testimony of that boy with disabilities… if he can see God’s goodness, surely, we can.  I love that story.  Who went up and shared it? It’s neat his Dad would ask you to do that. ♥

Things here— got the garage repaired—grateful!

Dogs got groomed today—Copper J was weird getting in and out of the travel kennel—I put him in the soft sided one which seemed to be better than the hard one that feels like an impenetrable den to him.  Anyway- it was time and they don’t look as weird as they sometimes do post grooming—maybe she didn’t go as short idk

Tomorrow the kids don’t have school so it’ll be a low-key day and we’ll leave way early for the airport so we can have time to circle around and practice the how you leave the airport drive—just make the loop back on to the freeway once so Graham is comfortable.

Lainey ahs been having a lot of highs and lows and I am worried about leaving her-  I think she needs a soft landing and since you aren’t here- I try to be that for her—sometimes I am probably not as patient as I could be- but I try.  So it’ll be a long weekend for her.  NO basketball though which will be a good break for her knees.

I am really having mixed feelings about my trip—hope it is productive—I am prepping mentally to know I won’t sleep/eat well- and it might just be exhausting physically and emotionally but hopefully some things will come together- Gray’s mission farewell is Sunday and I’ll get to be there and then right to the airport…so that’ll be good. I think Max is the youth speaker too ♥ I am sure Gray is ready to get the party started.. prob will do home MTC for a week in Uncle Dave’s man cave!

Here is a power quote about your missionary commission from Bruce R McConkie to end one… powerful stuff

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3/12/26

I just wanted to write quick to tell you how much I love you.  Nothing about this cruise will be as awesome without you ♥  I will be thinking of you the entire time—everyone will prob judge us as one of those couples with a his and hers, two kids- a boy and a girl—I feel like I should carry a sign around that says, I really have 6 kids and 2 sons in law, and a grandson—this part of four is just a snapshot of our family!! 

Lainey played in her bball game with the staff- it actually went into overtime—she had a sweet euro—played with the boys (coach steve’s son Zak and Aiden Miles who were ball hogs—anyway- it was fun to watch and she mostly enjoyed playing with Burns.  She looks good on Rocky’s court!! It made me miss you! 

I loved that you left me a journal to read about your two days since pday…

It was fun to read about how plans for your topic adjusting to missionary life—I am sure you’ll make it fun and applicable and powerful because I know you prepare by the spirit.

Freezing rain sounds like it would make the roads very slippery—please be careful!

That was a cool impression you had about choosing Christ and understanding that our entire process allows our Father in Heaven to bless us.  (Mosiah 27)

What kind of therapy does your comp have?  Yay for being able to direct a lesson—I think that says a lot about the kind of missionary you already are that you are willing and capable of doing that on your own as needed… pretty awesome.

The salad and rice did look interesting- but like you said, when you see their offering, you have to eat it and eat it  the second scoop—it’s so sweet how people serve missionaries that way especially when it requires much of them in cost or prep, or just their obvious awareness and desire to serve you.

Yay for connecting with Ben and I love how you said, “I found myself asking him if he would pray to ask if he should be baptized”  I love that you are so clearly led by the spirit- you didn’t plan it out exactly or check boxes like a robot—you “found” yourself speaking the invitation the Lord wanted to extend—because you know how to hear the spirit, it can work seamlessly in you- I hope you see that as powerful as an example as it is! 

I hope his lesson goes great on Friday!  I’ll pray for him by name!

Sorry this is so short—I need to be Lainey’s personal assistant right now—paint her nails, braid her hair, mend a dress for our trip—it’s nice to be needed- and pretty soon she won't "need" me to do any of these things- so I'm all about it...but it’s 11pm so I’d better get to it. 

We are all so proud of you—we will do our best to make Monday morning work—I hope it does!  I love you so much!  Also, I’m going to attach a picture of the dogs so you can show Papi’s mom!!

Love you

ps. Tomorrow is Watson's 8th birthday! We'll celebrate when we get back!  Sadie and Seth will be here (mostly) with the dogs while they are gone-- I hope that works out well

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3/26/26 “To know God and to make Him known.” – Loren Cunningham

Journal response starting with page 47 I love that when you needed strength you prayed for it—so much faith Abe—subtle answers and the ability to go on are still miracles.

Not sure where my printed 48 is but I’m moving on to 49 😊 since I’m catching up (and don’t’ think for a minute it’s too much or I don’t want to--  I pour over it loving every word and all the detail and all the feelings)

I love that you feel ready to testify even without feeling totally confident!  The Lord will qualify you and sanctify all that you do in his name.

That’s sweet that Zaki went to the church and yay for a friend that wants an in person lesson and keeps a commitment—I’m guessing he wasn’t at church though bc you said you didn’t have any “friends” there- so hopefully he has gotten more interested or has made some progress with lessons

Page 50 So exciting that Erin came to church and that members were aware of how wonderful that was that she was there!

I’m glad you’ve enjoyed Sis Smith- and glad your quad situation has been so positive for you-

Page 51 It’s fun you listed your district names, you won’t always remember them and it’s good to note down occasionally

Babe I know those pday goodbyes are hard, but honestly you are doing so good—I’d spend hours talking with Sadie and Emma in tears the whole time—For being my “emotionally connected one” you are handling big and hard things with remarkable control!  That’s an ongoing blessing from heaven and a manifestation of a gift of peace and an aptitude to feel that composure that you were promised in your blessing by dad before you left. Such a sweet reminder of how well our Heavenly Father knows us and knows our needs and liberally pours out blessings as we seek them

Thanks for handling that pday without us when we were on vacation—that was hard for me to not have more time with you but glad we got bookends of your pday with you.

Pgae 52 I bet that was weird about the power outage  in Walmart- and hopefully people weren’t stealing stuf- AND about Walmart—I think they have stepped up their clothes game—seems like they are doing better with offering more on trend stuff… you go Walmart

Yay for prayers to find “the one”  They are out there! Even in Loblaws (sp)!

Page 53 I love your “good answer” to William (and that is a good question too).  It’s neat to know for yourself and on your own—you’ll need that as President Nelson said in coming days!

I was so happy you got those boots!! They look cute with your roll hem pants!

 I do love that Greater love video but (don’t think less of me) I don’t like that Jesus actor—it’s  like he’s too Arabic or something—Idk- he’s prob spot on-but to me he looks like a comedian playing Jesus.  I feel less like that as it goes on- but it’s hard to get past my initial aversion to the actor… with that smirky smirk in the first scene on the donkey- Don’t tell your comp I said this bc I don’t want to ruin the video for her- I prob shouldn’t have told you!  It’s pretty cool that you can watch something 30 times and feel the spirit in it each time – It is a powerful message— “How He did it is also WHY He did it!!  The JOY THAT SUSTAINED HIM IN HIS SUFFERING WAS THE LOVE HE FELT FOR YOU!”

Page 53/54  It is a tough thing to juggle your first transfer and her last week.  I am sure she is trying, but it’s okay that you are feeling it too—it will be easier to refocus once she’s on her way, as much as you’ll miss her—and I’m sure she’s ready- but she’ll miss this and she’ll miss you- and it’s quite the chapter to round out…. I’m glad you are feeling “ready” in some ways at the end of one transfer of training and yes, lots to learn, but also neat to feel prepared in other areas- and it’s good to counsel with a new comp and do even better—take the best that you’ve gathered and improve from here!

 “Your French isn’t that bad?” Nice compliment elder! Hahaha—I am sure he meant it in the best way!

Page 55: it think we’re all trying to better live in a spirit led way- that’s a lifetime pursuit!

Page 56: Let’s just say a prayer is a good solution to change the tide- even just in attitude of vibe—excellent suggestion.  I’m so glad you had new members there to love on and see and that the ward received them well

A dog named Lucy fur?  That’s weird.  Did you tell him you have one named Copper J and one named Watson Fonzarelli?

Hahaha I just found my printed page 51 ♥  all is right in the world

Well love I’m sorry this took me so long to get back to you on—

News around here—this weekend is YARD WORK weekend--- fun times!  Preen for weed prevention, back hill weed spray, weeding in beds, fertilizing trees, thrive, mowing grass, and the lawn food that dad puts down.  We need to get after it because shocker no bball this weekend!  Which is nice—and next weekend with conference we’ll be busy—Viry comes on the 1^st—she’s been to Disney land this last week for Leila’s birthday and then to Arizona to Nathan’s parents house.  She called me today crying- just deals with a lot of anxiety and depression and doesn’t cope well when she’s maxed out.  Coming here will be good for her- but it’ s not been that long since she was here (end of Jan into Feb) and I want to help her, but also not enable her escaping her life.  Today Nathan (this is on the downlow) called me and broke down- like crying on the phone just worried about her, not sure how to help her when she goes into dark places in her thoughts—Just keep her in your prayers and maybe draft a non specific pump up email to send on pday—I actually sent her the links to that greater love video and the song Because of Him. And that jazzy version of I know that My redeemer lives-  and tried to reassure her that she isn’t alone—and that Jesus Christ is her peace.  (I also posted that on fb/Instagram)

Dad and the kids went golfing this afternoon/  I pulled dad aside (he needed some coaching ) and said, Lainey is on the fence—she doesn’t want to go bc she doesn’t golf well and in a very overt way Graham made it obvious he didn’t want her to (I’ll talk to him about that later, though he’ll deny it or get defensive – but he needs to hear it) I just told dad that Lainey needs his help and his attention to want to play and esp with her being the last one, it’s in his best interest and hers for her to like golf enough that they can go enjoy it together—Dad got the drift and so he’s not playing but getting the cart and going with them to focus on Lainey.  I hope it goes well

Tonight at 8 we are going to the temple (kids baptistry and us initatories) thought that might time up well together— I will of course be thinking of you!

Opah seems to be doing wel in rehab.  GG is flying to Utah on Sunday- Wed for her sisters funeral.  Aunt Jennie is picking her up and taking her back to her house for dinner with all the Provo college kids so that will be fun for everyone.  Sadie and Seth will be heading back to Idaho, but they will stop for dinner so everyone can see Miller—and that will be special.  I think the drive down went okay for Miller- he’s at a better age to be distracted in the car—Baby Einstein and the Happy song.   (I need to record that one for you)

Looking forward to Palm Sunday ( and no meetings I think!) 

Borther Kohler has had his daughter in town all week so that’s been great; he seems to be doing well

Watson had his bday on the 13^th- we celebrated the day we got home from Vacation—I didn’t really do pictures

Not much else to report—We love you so much and are praying you well!!!  (Manifesting a miracle !!)Here’s a power quote to end on: “Expect great things from God; attempt great things for God” – William Carey

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4/7/26 new transfer w/ Sis Curtis

 I read this quote today and then reread it- EVERYTYHING has to point us and others to Christ—it is ALL about Him

“Satan is delighted for us to be satisfied with having given of our time, contributed significant expense and helping a lot of people without introducing them to the One who can give eternal hope.” – Jerry Rankin

I know you lead hearts to the Savior because it’s easy to see how bound you are to Him

Journal response page 64

Cackling—that’s irritating—I’m sorry;  I hope these last couple days have been better—and I hope you have felt effective in gently guiding things back to the bedtime routine standards—they are that way for a reason.

How does she even have room for a guitar? Doesn’t she have another personal item, like a bag? Or does she just pay extra to move her guitar around?  An electric guitar is interesting—I mean you can’t play that kind in church or at a baptismal service, right?  So it’s just for playing for fun?

Having fun is fine- but reading the room is important too. Journal is a good place to vent about it!  Hopefully it is a little better now that the honeymoon phase of your quad-ship is past.  😊

I love the “Jane experience” I am so glad you shared it with us all—it’s so reassuring to know God is working through you and that He is involved in the details of His work!

Oh about the overheard convo between your comp and her mom—every area has a different rhythm and it’s your job together to figure it out and keep things moving—she is prob just adjusting to not having French and she’s gong to make it! She might not feel like she’s making a difference yet because she isn’t fully invested in this new area—and you’ve had a weird few days—things will pick up and you’ll find your post conference stride.  Between a weird week with transfer and trios to conference happening- it’s just a bit of a transition – but hopefully as this week goes along the cadence will pick up.  It’s prob always easy to miss the good in your last area and that becomes a buffer when you aren’t feeling totally comfortable in your new area—so good to see and remember for when you go to a new place— (think of it like when someone dies—we idealize them remember just the amazing parts, and focus there- not remembering or lingering on what was maybe negative or less than- same with a transfer—all the highs are what you miss- and it’s easy to just see the lows in a new spot till you dig in and get it going)

Lainey hasn’t heard your recording yet- but she will love it- and she needs it (and so do I- in your support of all these things) I won’t always listen to them, but I did this one – not all of it  but the first part-and I can see why Lainey leans on you so much and why she feels the void right now—I keep reminding her that all of this is her offering to the Lord and that He will support her in the longing--  I think she also still needs to read that comparison talk and it will be such a help- so keep her accountable; I will give her your recording to listen to today. You are such a gift to our whole family- and such an incredible blessing to Lainey.

Oh love- I hope you are having a good week so far.  I miss you- and you are in all my thoughts and prayers. (and so are your friends)

A quote to leave you with…  (& I’ll be better about shorter more frequent journal responses) 

God will not lead you where He will not provide for you.– David Sills

Xoxoxxo Mama

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4/12/26Miles upate-  That picture (which you need to not know and ask Miles all the questions and “find out” from him on pday 😊 is Maddy from the Glenwood, aka bracket girl.  They went to ice cream (date 1 mid week) and he really liked how easy she was to talk to.  Then miles had to go to a musical service for his music class (so they went to a catholic mass- that’s the picture) this morning—but like I said, you don’t know that or where the picture was taken or about the girl;- #protectyoursource  He is liking her but (and he even said this) I think more than he likes her (in his words. “she’s a nice girl, super chill, easy to talk to. Cute) he likes that she likes him and seems to be interested. He said that to us too- that it’s nice to date someone that seems intereseted—which is good--   It’s good for his confidence--,but not a reason enough to keep going if that’s the main draw.  Shes 20- from a divorced family, from bountiful- mom is not active dad “is” sometimes she would go to church with him, but not really- and she’s not baptized—believes, in Jesus- sort of but not really seeking it out.  Miles hasn’t asked her a lot of probing questions bc he can’t really yet- but between us—I don’t want him to get down the road and have it be harder or more hurtful, or even worse, have him get to liking her more , with the heart glasses on and not be able to discern objectively.  This is interesting bc as a highschooler- this would be more black and white—not that she isn’t a great girl- but we don’t need to go down a road that doesn’t lead to a place of mutual spiritual goals.. and at his age (not hers at 20) he needs to be dating with the intention of getting married—so if it’s not a go in all the areas (esp the important ones) then I just don’t want him to keep after it-  BUT- hes also 23 and an RM and he gets to use the spirit to figure this all out—lead into those questions about how important and central fatih is—we taliked that thru with him, btu it’s hard to know how to launch into that and at what point?  I think before they date much more—but how does that conversation go?  Dad approached it from the importance of finding someone who can in their mothering, build testimony and faith in children—which prob seems a ways off for Miles—Emma was pretty indifferent, which surprised me but I think she is gentle with his confidence- So we talked about it, around it, but didn’t really get anywhere—he aggress- with all the things, but also says he likes her and wants to get to know her better= meanwhile—he’s got that other girl from the service project (do you know about her?  I think you do—Braylee- the girl that was full of light that Emma and Noah liked) who he sort of has a date with this coming Sat—but she’s not an awesome texter so Miles goes into self-preservation mode a little and isn’t as hyped about her as he is with Maddy right now.  So I just hope that he can buckle down this week and study for finals next week, go out with Braylee (the service project connection) this weekend, maybe see Maddy one more time and then he’ll be home Tues- Sun for a long weekend before Spring starts where we can all have some more heart to hearts;  I know we have to to trust him, and I know he wants the things we are hoping for him- I just hope we can be patient enough for him to see it for himself before he is a little more tangled in it=- that’s not to say if she was interested in faith that wouldn’t be cool, but I’m not getting that drift;  I  know he knows-- I just am being prayerful that he's considering all this by the spirit.  But anyway- there’s your pre phone call pday context- that you need to not disclose, btu like the amazing sister you are, feel it out, give input (and maybe it won’t be in the group, maybe after you talk it’ll be more an email you leave in your drafts folder- idk= I don’t want him to worry that what he’s hoping for isn’t out there- I know confidence is something he struggles with- and maybe Maddy is awesome—I am just worried about some pretty important components. (she’s also a psychology major) ha Anyway- there’s what you don’t know- so fire away tomorrow as you naturally would!

Journal response page 68 ♥ 4/7 yay for a normal day and getting into a rhythm again;

Every Time you write about her not being comfortable in English I think  of that reel with that guy (from our stake) and his ordering food in his “accent” Anyway I love how you know to pray about it for strength and positivity and how you see the Lord blessing you quickly in those moments when you feel that you need Him

4/8 The Elder Aldredge saga—prep now bc you’ll go thru that with roommates too—sometimes you just don’t care= at least as much as they think you do/should. There is time for pillow talk, but mid day is a rough time to go there—and it’s good you recognize it- and can gently redirect

I wonder if the best help she can be to you with language is just practicing talking—not so much individual questions- but conversational practice- the rest will come when you are more in it…

That’s interesting that you’ve noticed a lack of listening skills—so important to be open and share but also to be invested in listening= that’s a big deal life skill- it’s how you make someone feel like a priority!

I’m sorry you won’t have water for a bit—why?

I will have to ask you more question about Zaki—I understand about Algeria—but what is a PR?  Fill me in if I forget to ask

Page 69 Yay for Amika products from TSA day!

That’s so wonderful when a talk comes together and feels like the spirit has guided you in it’s preparation.  I am sure it was amazing—I meant to ask you if your ward does zoom.  I bet you did so great!

You looked cute in that checked Dress and you matched so fun with your member friend (I can’t remember his name)

Oh Abe—your conversation with Jane broke and touched my heart—I can totally imagine you testifying and showing so much love—I know those two things will impact her no matter how this all rolls out; In my SLC training I thought it was cool they were talking about that intense love you are literally gifted with when you are set apart in a calling—they referred to it as “nuggets” (ignore that word and the whole deal we have with it) anyway “nuggets of God’s love for those we serve—so it’s not just you feeling love for them, it’s God giving you a portion of His love to rest in your heart”.  That’s why and how you can love a Jane so quickly and fully.  Isn’t that cool? Maybe not that profound to you- but to me it meant a lot to think that through the mantle of my calling (or yours) the delegated priesthood authority allows us to feel a portion of God’s perfect love for those we serve- ♥

4-11-2026 Yay for a mission president that would counsel with a Stake President—at least how ever it is decided that you should proceed- you have multiple thoughts and prayers seeking heaven to know what is best and needful.  If it happens that the answer is not Riverside—then take the angle to co teach with the other sisters,. To build a bond first and then work on transfer.  God knows Jane—He will work it together for her good—and maybe that will be in your ward, and maybe it won’t.  You just trust Him like you want Jane to- and it will all work out.  (But I see why the heartache in the process-)  I liked listening to your video roll plays—I am sure it was really helpful to send him a voice message (was that you or sis curtis) to really explain the situation so he would have all the information to consider as he pondered it.  Hopefully they will loop in your bishop (and maybe you should give him a heads up that the stake pres and mission pres are counseling about it) and see what the direction is. 

All right- I have to run bc dad is waiting !  Can’t wait to talk to you and see you tomorrow!  We will be up at 7 😊  Dad leaves around 8 tomorrow.  And I’ll take Lainey to school so she can talk to you a little—but you’ll have your chats (which I don’t listen to – Well I listened to yours to her bc we’d talked about that and I was so grateful- it was the perfect big sister mix of good counsel and understanding and letting her decide, but with a good approach in prayer and context)  I didn’t listen (and won’t) to the ones she sent you- but I know that was a “special time” for her with you mid week

I think Viry might come tomorrow—not totally sure.  I need to gear myself up to be “enough” for her emotionally and time/support wise- but after a week of swim registration ( which made me miss you a lot ) – and it goes on this week too. And RS calling stuff (we’’ve had a couple new RS Pres called so it makes for a lot more to do, work stuff, needing to edit Emma’s grad pics- just all the things-I ‘m feeling a little spread thin. I might edit while we visit tomorrow- I need to individually add blossoms to trees – it makes a big difference but is a tedious edit bc you have do them one by one or in detailed clusters to look realistic—I’ll show you a before and after.

Love you so so much!  You are the best missionary we know!!! Lainey and I said hello to your plaque todayl..it’s a sacred spot! Xoxo Mama

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 Page 73 4/17/26

I just read your journal entry and that is big news and I love it!  You do realize if it wasn’t an all French area going forward you’d be disappointed. And since it is you are nervous—and in either of those outcomes—you are willing and blessed and the Lord will provide as He always does!  But all the emotions are real and valid and it’s good to process them.  My heart is happy that you will get to grow in a language you have anticipated to use in your missionary service.  It will be, among many things, a very tangible way for you to feel God’s delegated Priesthood Authority working in you- as you are able to understand and ultimately testify and witness by the spirit in another language—it is a gift to be able to see that happen in real time in yourself—so when the “scaries” start – just redirect by trying to bring to the front of your thoughts that big faith of yours—and remember: His work, His purpose- your privilege, your heart

That is counsel I need to believe and trust in too- just got off the phone with President Albert—he wants me to lead the discussion (lesson) for the Paramount Ward Conference next Sunday the 26^th (combined RS/Priesthood) Topic- loving others as Jesus would. I am not excited- but willing (maybe at some point in this calling I’ll get to excited! That will be my tangible growth when I am not terrified of these assignments)

So any thoughts you have on that (or talks) I would love to know.  I did randomly before I talked with him listen to a devotional of Sister Dennis actually at Ensign College from May last year and thought the last half might have some good material to draw from

Certainly studying the five talks she mentions will.

I’ll put the link )at  the bottom of this email too in case you have time to listen/read (I’ll paste the text too, in case you can’t link to it)  The footnotes are an awesome study guide in and of themselves!!!

Okay so to the rest of  your journal (page 73)

Well first your pictures--- that message from jane ☹  On the upside, it’s good that she didn’t totally disconnect- and left the door open-  I think if you are able to just show her love and reassure her that she doesn’t need to feel pressure- that she can ponder over things (and hopefully you can be a support and a strength to her in the process) I am not sure if you got word back from your MP that’s it’s a no- and that’s her response- or if she’ is just needing more time in the interim I hope you can just love her through it—I am sure a response of support and it’s a good thing to ponder these things in your heart (that’s what Joseph Smith did and what we are encouraged to do in Moroni- to weigh it out and be prayerful to know…. So it’s good she’s doing that. 

That’s cute that you took cookies to your member friends—that probably means so much to them! The notes especially!  Yay for handwritten notes—they are the best and so meaningful that you would take the time!

I think there will be days that feel wildly successful with finding and days that people are less responsive and it’s okay- if you are doing your part it’s not on you—just trust that God is doing His work in the background linking things, lining things up and preparing what’s coming—you keep offering your willingness and obedience and let Him work the magic

So was your interview in person or on the phone?  Did you feel like it was more personal than last time- or still a checklist?  It’s going to take a lot of interactions to feel a love/ connection.  You should probably take it as a sign that he trusts you in this work with what he has felt/been told/sees so that’s a good thing. ♥  you are a powerhouse of faith and the spirit—He can feel that because it pours out of you like light!

It’s great you have a regular service opportunity with the men’s shelter—it’s neat to see how much good can be done little by little- also nice that your service isn’t shoveling driveways like you thought—not in this area anyway!

It’s nice you could get your oil changed and even though it took so long- sounds like you made some progress and good use of the time.  It’s so good to be able to pivot and accomplish the work in the middle of the mix of your days and experiences

Around here- I had Miller yesterday for Sadie and Seth’s anniversary—I think it was kind of a get things done day- but together so that was nice—seth took work off—they started early in the morning at the dermatologist and got two moles removed on either side of Sadie’s neck that have been bothering her- then they were going to organize the garage or something- I think they went to lunch and had temple recommend interviews and then came over for dinner in the night.  Miller was really great- it’s much easier to watch him now with his longer naps/ and he goes down well- plays happily- and is loving being a big kid being able to sit up (with eyes on him bc sometimes he leans and tips) He is a doll baby for sure.

VIry’s trip has been good- she’s spent a good amount of the day time with Rayana and that’s helped me focus.  I need to some training prepped for this Sunday with some ward Rs presidencies and work and I also need to work on Emma’s pictures—it’s fun but it’s tedious because I am adding by hand blossoms to the trees bc there weren’t tons of blossoms when we went= and to make it look realistic- it’s a slow process= I’ll show you a before an after to show you the tree difference (which prob doesn’t really matter esp for the time spent but it matters to me)  Anyway- Viry is leaving on Sunday (she says) but I think she has to to do something for Nathan and plus they got a new puppy (for Donna) but really Viry- which is good bc it will help when Watson goes) She’s a 3 year old Shitzu named Grimm—cute dog, but a hard time for V to be away.  Lainey has had fun with her here and she’s good to make special time (I think her love language is dutch bros drink runs) with the kids individually.

So it’s Friday and tonight is the Potato Bowl (hahaha so Idaho) (us California girls need to call out stuff like that) it’s a big tournament at Columbia High school- for Idaho but also some traveling teams (Utah mostly- heard rumors that Cicily Moser might be on a team that is coming…idk—that’d be fun) anyway we got the short stick of Late game tonight at 8 and early game tomorrow at 8am; and there are like 10 teams I think- and only the top 4 go to the championship game so we’ll see.  It’s 8^th grade though so that’s good- and I think we have a fair shot.  Our first game is v. Premier- so that could be a little rough- but we’ll see. I don’t know about the early sat team we are playing.  Sadie and Seth might come over in the evening- we’ll see how long bball goes

Dad had a pretty severe swallowing food stuck issue this week- lasted through the night and he was intending to go to the ER to get it resolved (ER AGAIN!!!) but gratefully it dissolved after all night and all day—dad was a trooper this week- with his eye issue, not being able to swallow (he could breathe though) and still doing his regular work!  I am so grateful he’s doing better on all health fronts. 

Emma is in full pack mode trying to consolidate her stuff and figure it out—she and Noah are still working out their Bali trip plans and that’s been a little rocky but they’ll figure it out.  Noah finishes up his finals tomorrow (Saturday)  Miles finishes up on Tuesday and will head home—He takes his O-chem on Monday so he prob won’t be on the chat much- I think Maddy comes back into town today and I hope Miles doesn’t prioritize her over the date with Braylee- hopefully that happens…Emma’s recommendation means a lot esp that she just had such a happy and light countenance== that is a big deal- I tried to talk to him about it and he was still planning on reaching out to her but hadn’t yet (that was yesterday, Thursday)

Well love- I better run- I sure love you—Keep letting that smile and your light loose—people will be drawn to it and then to the Savior.  What a cherished and  beautiful link you are to Him.

Xoxo  Mama

Here’s that talk by Sister Denis, Ensign College Devotional, May 2025

https://speeches.ensign.edu/devotional/sister-j-anette-dennis-05-2025

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4/24/26

  Lainey left you bucnh of recordings she said, I hope it wasn't too much- she loves and needs that one on one time with you and that is a fun way to do it-- back and forth

I’m so glad exchanges were fun—that sister reminded me of Cicily Moser- she had that kind light about her.  Yay for a good day and a mix up.

I’m so glad the ward is hopefully more aware of Fatih’s baptism.  That’s so wonderful – I hope they can wrap him in welcome and warmth

Hopefully your post pday soreness has worn off 😊

Speaking of comparisons—I saw Lainey has started highlighting that talk you gave her—I am surprised you’d try on your comps dresses anyway—I wouldn’t start that bc you’ll have comps who want to wear yours…not the greatest pattern to start- trust me. (true with roommates too)  anyway- I am sure being around peers is tricky- but honestly Abe—you have light pouring out of you—and it is the most beautiful thing--- just let your smile loose, do your best, give yourself grace- you are beautiful inside and out and I promise the light in you is the thing that is constantly there to radiate out—you might not always see it- but I do.

Yay for polkadots!  Now sister you better slow down your clothes spending—part of all of this mission experience (which wasn’t modeled for you by a forging comp going home) is to make it work and learn to get by with what you have—that lesson will help you in college and make it easier to function as newlywed--  Anyway- I love the dress already and can’t wait for pictures!

How cool that President thought of YOU to meet the GA during the mission tour—that will be a sweet experience—and I know for sure that he is going to see light all over the place in your smile, your faith and your willingness.  It’s also sweet to feel like President sees you—you might not have a lot of interactions with him yet, but he knows who you are and it’s neat he would select you to represent the missionaries and that he knows you will do it well.  ♥ IT’s cool bc someday who ever you meet with be speaking in conference or called to a different assignment and you’ll think back to this time in Ottawa when you got to meet him (Just like Elder Uctidor, and Sister Dennis at the MTC)

I am so happy we got that sign in thing figured out—I need my Abe fix and your journals during the week to feel connected!

It’s been nice having Miles home—He and dad had quite the pow wow heart to heart last night while G was at mutual and I was with L at bball.  We came in half way thru and dad was counseling with the heavy- esp where Maddy is related.  I think it was good but I could tell Miles wasn’t really hearing him—love glasses already on—it’s not just that he likes her that he likes, he really likes her—so that was a little worrisome—like he feels it’s not right to just send her down the road (bc at this point that would be a bummer for him) just because she’s not a member.  We talked a lot about compatibility and the bar and what matters most and what you don’t gamble with- he said some interesting things about her—and it seemed although he thinks it’s too early to tell- that she’s chosen to not engage with it—maybe because her exposure hasn’t been good or steady- but Miles approaches it like it’s the greatest missionary opportunity possibility; and I think that’s prob not an objective opinion.  We still “went there” with him and were pretty clear that the longer it goes the harder  it is on everyone- but he didn’t really seem to connect with what we are saying.  I felt a very strong comforting feeling in my heart to say the things and leave it there—to trust his ability to discern (although we talked about how your ability to discern is less sharp the more you like someone—you can’t or don’t see the red flags for what they are)  I know he knows- and his testimony is strong- I just hope he figures it out sooner than later—somethings he shared made me just think he’s further down the road liking her than we all thought—I also worry a little bc all the time and energy and headspace she takes up just doesn’t free him to be open to any other opportunities—and esp going into Spring and Summer- just wanted him to be focused on school and open to possibilities.  He’s feeling based on the HAGS from Braylee that there aren’t options- but spring/summer mix it up and I just wish he could move forward with faith and confidence in finding someone that is a better match. He doesn’t have a ton of time at BYU to dink around 😊 But he knows that too.

Sadie is here today bc she’s been worn down- she got whatever cold Miller had and I think she just needed a day to have some back up and a good solid nap (she’s asleep now in your bed 😊  Miller is napping too – which is why I tool this window to email you ♥ They have been full steam ahead on their garden and it’s going to be something !  So much work too- I don’t know if she’s realizing how much- but Seth is, as always, invested at the same level and makes up the difference- I think he’s built the beds and will get them ready for planning early in May

Graham is loving having Miles home—he’s louder and more jokey when he’s here-  I think the boys are golfing Friday evening.  I’ll take Lainey to her CTB – they are playing up in the high school division- so that should be interesting- playing Meridan Varsity team Friday night.  I hope we have a chance—I think Zoey and Lily and Taya will play with them- which isn’t saying a ton 😊  She started open gym and I think it’s gone well but her knees hurt- esp when there are double practices (open gym and then Steve) but that’s just twice a week.  She did say the upperclassmen were rude and not warm at all and I told her that’s just them feeling insecure-  also sadly a reflection on the program that BJ doesn’t build a culture that is one team. Or supportive off the whole program vibe.  I told Lainey to just be the kindest on the court and let her game do the talking.  I think they’ve been missing a lot of girls to track though bc there’s only been like 14 at open gym so far

Dad has had a stressful work week. But seems to be better health wise (swallowing and his eye so that’s good)

I’m worried for Sunday but it is coming along well I think- my confidence (small though it is) in it is that I have surely felt the spirit in the preparation.  I found out it’s going to be joint RS/EQ and in the chapel since the Paramount East bldg. is so small that everyone wouldn’t fit in the RS room- but anyway that changed up how I could present it—I decided to do a power point to make it more engaging- but as I’ve put it together I realize how homespun it is—not a cohesive font or pattern bc I am too old school to create it in PowerPoint- but do slides in Photoshop (and it shows)  Oh well.  I asked Dad what his thoughts were when I was considering doing a powerpoint and he said, “ don’t do that- you don’t know how to comfortably lead/teach from a powerpoint”  I was like wow.  True- but I wasn’t going to tackle the set up or anything- the stringhams are more than happy to get it all set up for me if I just create  a PowerPoint and Graham can help with that.  I was a little put off by that, I guess, not the confidence boost I needed, but I am still going ahead with it.  Ha.

I will send you my lesson on Sunday.  I am very nervous about it- esp with the mixed group and in the chapel- but I also trust in Heavenly Father’s ability to sanctify my best effort and so I’ll leave it in His hands- and try to feel super prepared-  That morning will be an early one with a 7am (are you kidding me) Stake Leadership council with the rms (one of these times it will be you!!!) and I was glad to think through that with you all on pday.  Ava Gammette went to st louis Missouri- don’t’ know if she spoke a language but I’m going to assume not.

It rained a lot the last few days- but looks all clear ahead and I’m ready for that; it’s been weird weather year—

I have to go bc Miller is up-no time to spell chck I LOVE you!  You are doing amazing things in amazing ways!  You inspire me with your faith and willingness to put yourself out there.

Xoxox  Mama

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4/28/26

JOURNAL RESPONSE page 79

I’m glad I could hear you tell me about this baptism on pday—even with all the close calls and nerve racking parts, you’re right- how you said, none of those things were known to Fahti

Thank you for writing Fatih’s testimony—I will put it in your keepsake blog with those pictures.  So amazing really- He knows—He is ready- it’s beautiful—that is a rare combination—and so special to be your first

We talked all about Fatih, but Sebastian was a champ too, braving that water!

I’m so glad Fatih already feels a connection with the ward and that will just keep growing—it’s neat that he’s confident and full of love enough to extend himself and make it so easy for people to connect with him

You wouldn’t ruin a baptism by playing Avery- and I think it would be a worthy goal to practice some so you can with more confidence—don’t let that talent be taken from you (light under a bushel)—apply it- prepare and it will be a blessing—you don’t have to know all the hymns- but pick three that would be good at a baptism and master them/suggest (new converts don’t know the songs you can help them choose one you can play) them as the songs that are chosen.  This would be a wonderful pday activity—even just 30 minutes—8 years of lessons—you got this! Sister Winter can be your piano angel!

Tonight I have a parent meeting for Rocky Summer ball--- here we go again.  Hopefully a little more info about section 7- not sure if that will include Lainey or not.

I think she had fun at Holland’s on Monday- they got a lot done on their project.  Her knees are really still bugging her—I have a hard time telling what is “push through it pain” and when we should rest—the days with 2 practices are hard—I thought this week we’d just do one each night—then we’ll have the weekend off bc of Utah and see where we are at—until she stops growing I don’t think it’s going to resolve itself—so it’s a fine line to figure out what she can and should play through

Graham went out to help at Grandpa’s Monday night and then to Sadie’s to help her build her tunnel- I think it will look amazing and Graham is sweet to jump in and help Seth- because Sadie is a big ideas person but not able to execute much physically or bc of Miller—I think G likes being needed too. He’s a good egg. Haha

I hope your mission tour is going well—I can just imagine you in that interview- I wish I could be a fly on the wall-  Hopefully it’s a day today full of insightful trainings and you come away from it feeling filled (carless, but filled)  Hopefully there’s some clarification on that end too- or some forward planning so you can make it work.  It’d be interesting to know the why behind the switch up or what it means for transfers- but that info will come soon!

Love you sweet girl!  You looked beautiful in the pic of the four of you in the car and yay for getting to see some new scenery- hopefully the trip down memory land and time near “the elder” is going okay; I am sure you were the warmest person in the room—that’s what you can control.  You can’t help but be that light—seriously- it’s just you!

Love you so much-excited to read about mission tour=xoxox Mama

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 4/28/26

Page 77 bottom half: I hope you’ll take a picture of the baptism program I’m excited to see it- you should encourage him to keep one as a keepsake—I know you will keep one!

Fun to find a friend (Beto) who has kids!!!

I think it’s great if Sis Curtis wants to drive—less liability for you—and yay! We def want to talk to you—though it’s hard when your comp is right there- but we’ll take what we can get.

I was so anxious to get your journal to read about mission tour—and happy to see videos of you (or your comp with her Regency accent and cookies) back in your apartment sweet apartment!

Page 81

I love how you continually validate your feelings/concerns but follow it up with your faith—it’s beautiful to see that pattern over and over in your journal because it’s a pattern for your life—and God cares about the little things too!  And you recognize his hand—and it’s sweet and wonderful

I’m glad that insight about you on pdays is like you post mission—I thought it was really neat counsel from Sister Gammette.  Maybe I needed to be at that crazy early 7am meeting just to hear that to share with you! ♥

 

I do love that you got to see a different vibe—it’s neat to think how much your experience will grow and change transfer by transfer- where now you have such a limited view of what missionary life/work is life but that with time, your heart and your confidence and your perspective grow- and yay for more French—it’s going to come when you are immersed in it—it’s going to keep activating your brain over and over in a way that ultimately it will become natural for you to think, speak in that language—it’s a journey to get there- but it will happen and so much easier when you are immersed!

 

Page 82  That’s fun that you felt like you knew “knew of or where known” bc of zoom calls or sister Morgan.  I am still waiting to see that big group picture and find my beautiful polka dot girl!

I know you are anxious about transfers and prob Moreso with President again indicating that change is coming- but neat that of all his missionaries—he knows and remembers you- enough to invite you to have an interview, and enough to remember where you are serving and hint at what’s next (he can’t possibly keep all that active in his brain after things are prayed over and moved around)  It’s also a blessing that you have a good idea that you have a week to find a little closure—with your ward/friends and feel like you knew it was time

It’s neat you felt a connection to the Sorenson’s through that training—maybe that matters because you will stay with them when the mission splits (will they stay Montreal MP or get changed to one of the other ones) or maybe it’s sweet just because you needed to learn something from them in this time you did have with them- either way you’ll know in the summer—but both scenarios are a blessing

 

Thank you for sharing your insights from training= that’s so neat for me- to see what touches your heart and to learn from it myself/

I love that “be still” in Christ is a total surrender ♥not stationary

That’s interesting there was such specific direction to be hip to hip with your comp in the big group—I can see how easily the focus shifts or someone could feel unimportant if they weren’t “well connected” or a natural social butterfly.  Good to interact though- it makes you mission more fun when you feel a part of a group that is good and seeking and doing the work- but also important to balance that it isn’t “social hour or a lounge”  hahahha *Mrs Crookham

Page 83 That cool  Elder Holland quote might be something to share with Miles) when you email him next you can tell him I shared his update with you- (his life/dating update below- don’t skip ahead 😉) I actually sent him the things I shared with you so he knows) but it would still be meaningful to hear your resting take on his choices forward.  Your counsel matters to him and prob more in an email than a group call

I’m glad you could sit next to the Sanfills at lunch and have more opportunity to share Fatih’s journey. 

 

I love that you felt so prompted with jane—and in specifics—kneeling prayer!  Testifying of blessings!  (Still no word from you MP about that?  Should you follow up about it specifically in a phone call before you see Jane?)  I think “leaving” is a good reason to lay it all out there—and that coupled with the obvious love you feel for her—

I love that you got emotional in your interview—it’s like a key to your heart and that’s a sweet thing to be vulnerable (even if involuntary) with someone else in that way, especially when that someone has delegated priesthood authority to bless you with counsel and love and so my heart is happy you thought of a question for him—that you took advantage of the opportunity to ask… to seek

 

This is very riveting reading by the way- I almost don’t’ want to put it down as I go to have to pause to respond before reading more… hahaha

I think it would be powerful to hear Amazing Grace in French sung by missionaries—it must just feel like a surge of the spirit to be included in such a force for good and light and right—it’s neat to think that these general authorities get to be filled with that and then report back to Salt Lake about it.

That’s neat that while you might not see the change, others will.  Others who will notice it in you (us) others who will lean on it (missionaries you serve with) others who will grow it (your missionary assignments as you move along in this time of service)  I think it’s a beautiful testament to what your heart wants and what you are striving for—the Lord sees that and will bless you.

Also a really neat observation you had that the “adjustment to missionary life” hasn’t been as hard as you thought (or smooth)  and the correlation that the level or depth of your reliance on Christ has been a huge factor in that.  That’s what the Lord means in Luke 12:48 - where much is given, much is required—He needed you to launch and He knew you could because you came prepared by your time in the temple and your dedication to your scripture study and your faith base so that you could--- and you might not see it- but I do—and it is an exciting and hopeful and powerful trajectory you’re on!

Well—I’ll be anxious for more details about your comp’s elder and how that went down—whether it was just awkward or felt right or was as significant of an interaction as she hoped or thought it would be—but we can talk about that on pday- might be better than you having to journal all about it.  I’m excited to see more mission tour pics—if you took any more group ones (big or small)

On the homefront—I’ll start with what you want to know most about—MILES and Maddy ( or better named Miles not Maddy--- yes!!!)

my heart is bounding out of my chest in gratitude—like I just got off  the phone with Miles (we’ve been texting more since he went back to school, and he just called and so it seemed like a good time to check in on this Maddy situation now that he’s two days back in Provo)—So after this week of on again off again counsel with Miles from Dad and I  and insights and questions from you siblings—some of it probably more effective than at other times— he said after much prayer and talking it out with family (and surprisingly even Cache because they talked it out on the way back to school bc Cache rode with miles),  that he’s not going to pursue it- and just let it fizzle out- and he’s going to trust that God has something in store for him that aligns better and so I’m guessing  it feels a little unsure- but that is where he’s headed—to let it go and trust in what’s next-- the right direction and it is a  good thing- and I hung up the phone and said “thank you thank you” about 10 times out loud not realizing until that moment how much angst and concern I’d been holding on to and suppressing- wanting that outcome—trying to trust God to get Him there…that it matters as much to Miles and to God as we all think it does that he dates someone that prioritizes covenants and a mutual and individual  relationship with Jesus Christ as much as he does- Watching Miles navigate this it is has been a powerful and  tangible example of a faith leap—and my heart is singing that he’s willing to take it- and prove God in it…and I know He will- Miles deserves some kind of wonderful in this area especially! She’s coming!

Just feeling grateful for a prompting to rest back after the counsel and trust that Miles knows how to discern and receive revelation in his decisions—to just let him get there in his time—I think the push from the group to not keep heading in that direction was good and needed recentering counsel for him, but also he needed to just come around to it- What a blessing to have strength in family and faith and to be able to be safe with each other in these things we navigate that matter so much—how we are all cheering each other on and have the best intentions and expectations for each other’s happiness at heart.

Lainey had a good time at Open Gym- the parent meeting was the regular stuff.. Section 7 (where all the top varsity players g0- the kids that are gong D1 or want to- lots of scouts etc) is the tournament Varsity is going to- BJ said he had 8 or his 10 spots filled for that (he said he has 11 players that will be Varisty so far (maybe he’ll add one or two more for reg season) but of the 11, he had 8 that were going to section 7 (not sure if the others just can’t go- likely bc of summer plans or finances) or what so he’ll prob take 2 more to that—and then Frosh JV (which is where I think Lainey will and should land- JV for summer ball and maybe season but idk- but for summer) will go to Gonzaga.  They are looking for a parent to go- and I am trying to decide if I want to volunteer- to drive a rental car with girls, do the things- part of me wants to but also part of me thinks thigs would be a good independent launch for Lainey- and bc Holland will go to (whether she’s JV or Frosh) it feels like there’s a built in safety net and I’d love for her to foster that without me there- so I’m leaning on not volunteering- my guess is that another parent will, but just tossing that around) Anyway that’s the end of summer ball- so we’ll see-  Still not tons of girls at open gym but thinking it’s hard with other sports.  May 18^th is tryouts—should know close to then where the girls land as far as summer ball teams.

Speaking of BBall- it’s nice that we’re gone some this weekend- Steve wanted to do another tournament but when I told him Lainey was out, he said they’d wait and play another weekend—her knees need the break

Thursday afternoon we’ll drive down- prob around 3 – so get in fairly late—then Emma’s ceremony is early Friday, we’ll load up and head back…home around 8 pm I’m guessing.  I need to tidy up a little up there—so it’s all ready for them- ready with it also being a home gym- hopefully that’s okay to share the space – I get the feeling like Noah will be working from home half the time- so that could be interesting.

Saturday we’ll prob just let Emma and Noah get settled and then Sat night we’ll go to dinner at that taco place on the Eagle river (we’ll take you there- it’ a fun vibe) and then I made a temple baptism apt-  I love to go with G and L, and thought that would be good with Em and Noah- but maybe next time we’ll do an endowment- it’s been awhile since we’ve done that

Graham was saying Hyrum Tuft got his call to Frankfurt, Germany- which is cool- esp since Sampson and his dad did Germany- but then Graham said maybe Hyrum was kidding- because he’s never really serious (that surprised me, Hyrym always seems serious to me (and slow) but apparently he’s funny (and fast as a runner) so clearly I don’t know)

Sadie is going to come over Friday to play with the dogs while were’ gone so that’s nice.  I didn’t go over Tues night for mutual to watch Miller bc they did a service project for her neighbor so she took Miller and I haven’t seen him this week- so looking forward to that on Sunday for dinner/CFM

Well love- I’ll end for now—love you so much;  trust that everywhere you go&  Everyone you share with has the potential to feel the light and love of the Savior—

He sees them and you!   Xoxoxo Mama

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5/4/26

I have been checking for transfer news every few hours!  😊 

So kind of Sebastian to treat you to lunch—what a guy!

I think it’s great you are able to fill Jane’s home with the spirit when you are with her—don’t underestimate the blessing that is—I love your invitation for her to be prayerful—that’s all you can do—bring her light and truth and let her decide—all the seeds you have planted ma not be ready yet, but they are in there and they will germinate—just trust that you are leaving her better than you found her – God’s got the rest ♥

I was happy when I saw you with the mcDonald’s mango smoothie- sweet of David!  People are so kind!  And you are loved—I hope you can tell

Pg 87  You are almost to the “at the beginning of my mission I did that too” end!  Wahoo!!

I am sure she is well intended- or maybe just justifying a little her choices to not keep the bar as high- who knows.  You don’t need to measure “being at that part of your mission” with anyone else—because it will look different.  You know what works and what is required and the Lord knows your heart- I think it seemed passive aggressive to make it about distractions when it’s probably about her wishing she had more news from home- and I do worry that maybe it gets a bit much from me—ooooffff- but I also trust that you wait for  the right time and that it keeps you feeling looped in more than looped out.  If it doesn’t you just tell me and we’ll do less—but mostly I’m guessing that’s just her displacing her feelings- or maybe genuinely checking in that it isn’t distracting.  Who knows-

You will be back and you can see Fatih again—hopefully at a sacrament meeting! IT’s cool how you can keep in touch with people too-

Page 88Sorry about the drive.  You should have used my line; “That’s distracting to the driver!!!” IT’s good that your heart wants to be Christlike—but enough is enough

How amazing to have 3 friends at Stake Conference!!! Yay!

Aren’t you a little worried if Sis Curtis is transferred out too – then how will your notes get out?  I guess you’ll both know before tomorrow so if you have to take a little time on pday, you can deliver. I’m so excited to find out what’s next—and what it will mean traveling for you?  Bus or train likely?  And with whom and to where?   Aghh!!! I like the switch up—everything fresh start.  Wherever the Lord is sending you- you are needed!!!

Just wanted to catch up on your journal before pday

Tomorrow I have all day to talk to you whenever it works in your schedule- well except that I have to take the dogs to the groomer at 9:30 and then pick them up prob around 2- but I can talk in the car—the other kids might be more hit and miss but I’m guessing it might be a little different if you plan in your transfer travel- or guessing you might need to go to the store for Sis Curtis anyway—Just let me know in the morning what your day looks like-

 

Love you babe!  Talk to you soon—and I’ll check your camera roll tonight after bball and update the chat!! We’re all hyped!!

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